The Story of Michael and EllieNasty Nate |
  Apr 21 2009, 08:32 PM
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#1
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 Forum Senator  Group: Member Posts: 7583 Joined: 24-September 07 From: murdaland Member No.: 30919 
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Lonely Ellie, seeking companionship, one day decided to register on the internet-dating site, okcupid.com:
 She happened upon the profile of a gentleman name Michael, and it was nearly love at first sight:  Overjoyed, Michael was quick to respond:  Ellie could already feel herself falling deep for Michael's smooth charm:  Then, Michael showed Ellie his sensitive side:   Despite Michael's sob stories, Ellie was not scared away:  His wooing powers knowing no bounds, Michael quickly came back with this f**king War and Peace about his pathetic life:    What does this mean for Michael and Ellie's relationship? Have they found true love? Or is it doomed for failure? Find out, in the forthcoming conclusion! ... --------------------         QUOTE(jackbliss @ Oct 27 2009, 06:20 PM) I even made a boy named William and a girl named Jessica reunite their love for one another when Will dedicated Final Fantasy-9 "Melodies of Life" to her... it was so touching it left me speechless. I just want to share this same kind of magic and wonderful feeling with you all.  QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Dec 7 2009, 10:53 AM) It's been secretly licensed by the government. If you download porn for free on the internet, and you are over 18, they are allowed to put you in a drug induced hypnotic trance and make you star in porn, apart from your awareness. This is not a threat... but my dreams tell me, that I might have been sucking donkey dick, thinking it was my own dick. It felt like my own. The distorted proportions seemed natural because it felt like a dream. There was no fear, but this is something that I must live with... I sucked a donkey dick... i like your beard. |
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Nasty Nate |
Apr 21 2009, 08:33 PM
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#2
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Forum Senator Group: Member Posts: 7583 Joined: 24-September 07 From: murdaland Member No.: 30919
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Her heart pounding and her pussy wet, Ellie decided to up the ante:
 It seemed Michael had finally found his one true love:  A slave to Michael's undeniable appeal, Ellie knew at this moment that she was in love:  Michael decided to get a little more personal:  What followed was this catastrophic exchange, which would change both of their lives forever... Expired link: Yrs2BYIj6h8 -------------------- QUOTE(jackbliss @ Oct 27 2009, 06:20 PM) I even made a boy named William and a girl named Jessica reunite their love for one another when Will dedicated Final Fantasy-9 "Melodies of Life" to her... it was so touching it left me speechless. I just want to share this same kind of magic and wonderful feeling with you all. QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Dec 7 2009, 10:53 AM) It's been secretly licensed by the government. If you download porn for free on the internet, and you are over 18, they are allowed to put you in a drug induced hypnotic trance and make you star in porn, apart from your awareness. This is not a threat... but my dreams tell me, that I might have been sucking donkey dick, thinking it was my own dick. It felt like my own. The distorted proportions seemed natural because it felt like a dream. There was no fear, but this is something that I must live with... I sucked a donkey dick... i like your beard. |
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Scott Marcks |
Apr 21 2009, 08:34 PM
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#3
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 Cesspool Filthling Group: Members Posts: 5 Joined: 7-April 09 Member No.: 74013
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ground floor in what may be the best caper ever
"you sound very different than i expected" This post has been edited by Scott Marcks: Apr 21 2009, 08:43 PM -------------------- im jski, sup
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sharkporn |
Apr 21 2009, 08:35 PM
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#4
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 :iceburn: Group: Member Posts: 836 Joined: 7-April 09 Member No.: 74029
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if i could give this video more 5s i would literally go down to the 5 mine and mine all of the 5s and give them to it
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GMC |
Apr 21 2009, 08:39 PM
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#5
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 Groovemastercox Group: Member Posts: 1832 Joined: 18-July 06 Member No.: 15882
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"the most I'd do is say and give you my number and pray to the Old Gods you'd call. because your beauty would make me fear my tongue"
"pray to the Old Gods" This post has been edited by Groovemastercox: Apr 21 2009, 08:39 PM -------------------- |
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Cummy Mummy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:40 PM
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#6
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 Backseat Moderator Group: Member Posts: 3543 Joined: 22-September 07 Member No.: 30829
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I am like a warrior without any altruistic cause for which to fight... nationalism is tainted by the actions of the nation, religion is tainted by the bureaucracy that uses it as a tool for control of the masses... that leaves only love left to live and strive for.
-------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 16 2010, 04:55 PM) I witness live child molestation at every Christmas and child birthday party, or family gathering, that I've been at.   |
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Stanley Spadowski |
Apr 21 2009, 08:40 PM
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#7
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 Fat Nigger Running From a Clowncoaster of Food Group: Member Posts: 1245 Joined: 5-February 06 Member No.: 8880
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Damn, that's hot...
Nothin's better than a chick all Sturmrabed up, beggin' for it. --------------------   |
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LaFeknReina |
Apr 21 2009, 08:40 PM
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#8
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Grease Magnet Group: Member Posts: 24 Joined: 13-April 09 Member No.: 74450
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There are no words for the epic amount of awesome that has happened here.
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sharkporn |
Apr 21 2009, 08:43 PM
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#9
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:iceburn: Group: Member Posts: 836 Joined: 7-April 09 Member No.: 74029
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i want to read the good parts of those PMs but there are just so many god damn good parts
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I Eat Tin Foil |
Apr 21 2009, 08:45 PM
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#10
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 CLARENCE PUT DOWN THE PHONE Group: Member Posts: 4314 Joined: 23-March 05 From: CAL-EE-FOR-NEE-YAH Member No.: 2594
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niggaz gettin pwned
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Cummy Mummy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:46 PM
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#11
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Backseat Moderator Group: Member Posts: 3543 Joined: 22-September 07 Member No.: 30829
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literally all it took to make sturmrabe fall madly in love with a total stranger was for her to tell him that she might possibly like him.
-------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 16 2010, 04:55 PM) I witness live child molestation at every Christmas and child birthday party, or family gathering, that I've been at. |
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ISYF |
Apr 21 2009, 08:47 PM
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#12
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 Witty Third Option Group: Sheepie Winner - 2008 Posts: 6079 Joined: 23-February 07 Member No.: 23581
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NECROLUST BATTLEFURY
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sharkporn |
Apr 21 2009, 08:47 PM
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#13
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:iceburn: Group: Member Posts: 836 Joined: 7-April 09 Member No.: 74029
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the best part was how he literally instantly transitioned from completely lovestruck, overwhelmed, stuttering, and nervous to "heh yeah i was in on it all along i dont care"
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Tenebrae Vision |
Apr 21 2009, 08:47 PM
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#14
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 Malevolent Bitch Group: Member Posts: 1006284 Joined: 13-March 05 Member No.: 27
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That was a lot of time to invest just to burn Sturmrabe...
That being said, I have to admit to being really disappointed in Sturm. He went in for someone who appeared to be a complete ditz. He comes across desperate to please a dingbat. So much for wanting an intelligent woman. What a douche. -------------------- No trees were harmed in the posting of this message, though a large number of electrons were inconvenienced..
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Some Guy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:47 PM
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#15
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 Forum Milkman Group: Section Mod Posts: 7439 Joined: 15-March 05 From: The other side of the pillow Member No.: 884
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"I never got to meet my father and I mother pretty much dumped me off on my grandmother who raised me, in the very Old World European fashion (never mess with a stubborn old German woman)"
-------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 7 2010, 07:42 PM) The exploitation of the goofy looking retard wears off in the the 5th grade, but the exploitation of teen boobs has a timeless value that has been around since ancient time.  |
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ISYF |
Apr 21 2009, 08:48 PM
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#16
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Witty Third Option Group: Sheepie Winner - 2008 Posts: 6079 Joined: 23-February 07 Member No.: 23581
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but in all seriousness that was p. gosh darn f.ing hilarious
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Some Guy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:49 PM
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#17
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Forum Milkman Group: Section Mod Posts: 7439 Joined: 15-March 05 From: The other side of the pillow Member No.: 884
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QUOTE(Danse Macabre @ Apr 21 2009, 08:47 PM) That was a lot of time to invest just to burn Sturmrabe... That being said, I have to admit to being really disappointed in Sturm. He went in for someone who appeared to be a complete ditz. He comes across desperate to please a dingbat. So much for wanting an intelligent woman. What a douche. It only took one day! That is the best part. Wait, no... I can't decide what the best part is. -------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 7 2010, 07:42 PM) The exploitation of the goofy looking retard wears off in the the 5th grade, but the exploitation of teen boobs has a timeless value that has been around since ancient time. |
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Cummy Mummy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:49 PM
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#18
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Backseat Moderator Group: Member Posts: 3543 Joined: 22-September 07 Member No.: 30829
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QUOTE(Some_Guy @ Apr 21 2009, 08:49 PM) It only took one day! That is the best part. Wait, no... I can't decide what the best part is. answer: every part -------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 16 2010, 04:55 PM) I witness live child molestation at every Christmas and child birthday party, or family gathering, that I've been at. |
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ISYF |
Apr 21 2009, 08:50 PM
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#19
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Witty Third Option Group: Sheepie Winner - 2008 Posts: 6079 Joined: 23-February 07 Member No.: 23581
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happy birthday from abs forums
"dude i was in on it all along" buuuuulllllshit no you weren't "i don't care" -------------------- |
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Scott Marcks |
Apr 21 2009, 08:51 PM
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#20
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Cesspool Filthling Group: Members Posts: 5 Joined: 7-April 09 Member No.: 74013
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QUOTE(sharkporn @ Apr 21 2009, 08:47 PM) the best part was how he literally instantly transitioned from completely lovestruck, overwhelmed, stuttering, and nervous to "heh yeah i was in on it all along i dont care" "He who hesitates is lost", as they say -------------------- im jski, sup
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Tenebrae Vision |
Apr 21 2009, 08:51 PM
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#21
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Malevolent Bitch Group: Member Posts: 1006284 Joined: 13-March 05 Member No.: 27
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A day. Dude, were you both hitting F5 over and over?
I dunno, I just can't see spending more than 10mins trying to burn someone. Seems a waste of time. But if you got epic lulz and had nothing better to do, glad you got what you wanted. But damn.. Sturm, really? Though, I will say this much. Karma is about a bitch, isn't it? He was all over it when Muse's saga was revealed and reveled in her misery. Now the shoe's on the other foot. Will we see Sturm again? Somehow, I doubt it. -------------------- No trees were harmed in the posting of this message, though a large number of electrons were inconvenienced..
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Nasty Nate |
Apr 21 2009, 08:53 PM
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#22
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Forum Senator Group: Member Posts: 7583 Joined: 24-September 07 From: murdaland Member No.: 30919
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QUOTE(Danse Macabre @ Apr 21 2009, 09:51 PM) A day. Dude, were you both hitting F5 over and over? i was pretty much chillin and smokin blunts all day, and every time i came back to my computer i had a new response from him. i had a blast, honestly. -------------------- QUOTE(jackbliss @ Oct 27 2009, 06:20 PM) I even made a boy named William and a girl named Jessica reunite their love for one another when Will dedicated Final Fantasy-9 "Melodies of Life" to her... it was so touching it left me speechless. I just want to share this same kind of magic and wonderful feeling with you all. QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Dec 7 2009, 10:53 AM) It's been secretly licensed by the government. If you download porn for free on the internet, and you are over 18, they are allowed to put you in a drug induced hypnotic trance and make you star in porn, apart from your awareness. This is not a threat... but my dreams tell me, that I might have been sucking donkey dick, thinking it was my own dick. It felt like my own. The distorted proportions seemed natural because it felt like a dream. There was no fear, but this is something that I must live with... I sucked a donkey dick... i like your beard. |
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Cummy Mummy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:53 PM
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#23
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Backseat Moderator Group: Member Posts: 3543 Joined: 22-September 07 Member No.: 30829
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there's not a single moment of this entire caper that's not outrageously awesome.
-------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 16 2010, 04:55 PM) I witness live child molestation at every Christmas and child birthday party, or family gathering, that I've been at. |
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fluffman86 |
Apr 21 2009, 08:54 PM
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#24
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 Critical Thinker Group: Member Posts: 2068 Joined: 14-March 05 From: Edgemoor...um, yeah... Member No.: 647
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aww...everyone's pickin' on Sturm. :'( It's OK sturmrabe, I still love you and your red text.
 -------------------- QUOTE(Submatrix @ Apr 15 2007, 07:09 PM) Setting IE to 'secure' is a lot like putting on your seatbelt in a crashing plane QUOTE(Submatrix @ May 3 2007, 05:40 PM, speaking to me) you are recommending that wander uses linux The Weekend Meltdownhe cant even use windows think QUOTE(wanderofys @ May 3 2007, 10:06 PM) I'd be insulted if you weren't pretty much right |
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ISYF |
Apr 21 2009, 08:54 PM
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#25
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Witty Third Option Group: Sheepie Winner - 2008 Posts: 6079 Joined: 23-February 07 Member No.: 23581
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make a separate subforum called "Loser Island" and make it so that everybody can post in it, but Sturmrabe can ONLY post in it
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sharkporn |
Apr 21 2009, 08:54 PM
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#26
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:iceburn: Group: Member Posts: 836 Joined: 7-April 09 Member No.: 74029
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tenebrae vision if you don't think that this is the funniest thing that's been posted in literally months then You Are A Broken Hag, sorry to inform you
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I Eat Tin Foil |
Apr 21 2009, 08:54 PM
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#27
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CLARENCE PUT DOWN THE PHONE Group: Member Posts: 4314 Joined: 23-March 05 From: CAL-EE-FOR-NEE-YAH Member No.: 2594
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the fact that tene is trying to say how pathetic the situation is only makes it that much funnier.
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Some Guy |
Apr 21 2009, 08:56 PM
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#28
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Forum Milkman Group: Section Mod Posts: 7439 Joined: 15-March 05 From: The other side of the pillow Member No.: 884
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QUOTE(8-bit video game character @ Apr 21 2009, 08:53 PM) there's not a single moment of this entire caper that's not outrageously awesome. -------------------- QUOTE(Jakob the Liar @ Jan 7 2010, 07:42 PM) The exploitation of the goofy looking retard wears off in the the 5th grade, but the exploitation of teen boobs has a timeless value that has been around since ancient time. |
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ISYF |
Apr 21 2009, 08:57 PM
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#29
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Witty Third Option Group: Sheepie Winner - 2008 Posts: 6079 Joined: 23-February 07 Member No.: 23581
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dude the people in their late 30s got to stick together on harsh internet forums like ABS CHIT CHAT
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Tenebrae Vision |
Apr 21 2009, 08:59 PM
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#30
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Malevolent Bitch Group: Member Posts: 1006284 Joined: 13-March 05 Member No.: 27
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Trust me, I am not defending Sturm. He went beyond sad, at this point.
I think it's funny, I just can't imagine spending time on it. HOWEVER, since this is just 1 day and he's pouring out his life story.. bordering on declaring undying love for someone who vaguely intimated that she might 'like' him? Wow.. That's just.. Sturm hit new lows today. Kudos. -------------------- No trees were harmed in the posting of this message, though a large number of electrons were inconvenienced..
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